So,
Another day, another dollar. Had quite the week knocking on doors, selling milk and being accosted by dogs and countless strange people. The other day I was talking to a Romanian lady who really didn't seem to want free milk and bread delivery. Her dog seemed to want it though. I was petting it to calm it down, but it REALLY wanted the service. So then it pissed on my foot. Instead of freaking out, I decided to use the fact that her dog pissed on me as leverage to make the sale. "KOKA! No Koka! Calm down! *romanian cursing*" The lady finally said, "No, I don't want it", so I said "That's fine. Quick question though. Do you have a garden hose?" "Why you want garden hose?" "For the dog urine on my foot"
So, long story short, I rinsed off my foot with her garden tap. Oh, I was wearing sandals at the time as well.
Later, I was explaining the service to one really large lady who kept agreeing with what I was saying. After every sentence she would say "Yeeaahh." She would stress the eee and drag out the word in the same way and same tone every time. "Yeeaahh" "and the milk is from Warnable" "Yeeaahh" "It's higher in protein and calcium than what you're getting in the grocery store" "Yeeaahh" "and the bread it baked fresh daily-" "Yeeaahh" "and gets to your doorstep 4 hours at most after it's been baked" "Yeeaahh" I went on for a good 3 minutes and she kept saying the same thing in the same crazy tone of voice. At this point I was starting to question whether or not she was fully sane, but I kept on going anyway as she wasn't saying no. "So delivery starts up on the 24th of january in your area" "Yeeaahh". I went through everything with her and started running out of things to say. "so...it's free delivery, like I said...no cancellation fees or anything like-" suddenly out of nowhere, she broke in with "No thank you I'm actually not interested" This startled me, as I had never heard her say anything that wasn't yeeaahh. "Oh, alright then." My mouth curled into a smile and I bit my lip then I turned around quickly and walked away. I then had a good side splitting laugh for around five minutes.
All in all this seems to be a good job so far. And they treat us well too. Had two free meals with them this week, and loads of free drinks. The people I work with are cool too. Today's my day off. Gonna go do day off things now.
Another day, another dollar. Had quite the week knocking on doors, selling milk and being accosted by dogs and countless strange people. The other day I was talking to a Romanian lady who really didn't seem to want free milk and bread delivery. Her dog seemed to want it though. I was petting it to calm it down, but it REALLY wanted the service. So then it pissed on my foot. Instead of freaking out, I decided to use the fact that her dog pissed on me as leverage to make the sale. "KOKA! No Koka! Calm down! *romanian cursing*" The lady finally said, "No, I don't want it", so I said "That's fine. Quick question though. Do you have a garden hose?" "Why you want garden hose?" "For the dog urine on my foot"
So, long story short, I rinsed off my foot with her garden tap. Oh, I was wearing sandals at the time as well.
Later, I was explaining the service to one really large lady who kept agreeing with what I was saying. After every sentence she would say "Yeeaahh." She would stress the eee and drag out the word in the same way and same tone every time. "Yeeaahh" "and the milk is from Warnable" "Yeeaahh" "It's higher in protein and calcium than what you're getting in the grocery store" "Yeeaahh" "and the bread it baked fresh daily-" "Yeeaahh" "and gets to your doorstep 4 hours at most after it's been baked" "Yeeaahh" I went on for a good 3 minutes and she kept saying the same thing in the same crazy tone of voice. At this point I was starting to question whether or not she was fully sane, but I kept on going anyway as she wasn't saying no. "So delivery starts up on the 24th of january in your area" "Yeeaahh". I went through everything with her and started running out of things to say. "so...it's free delivery, like I said...no cancellation fees or anything like-" suddenly out of nowhere, she broke in with "No thank you I'm actually not interested" This startled me, as I had never heard her say anything that wasn't yeeaahh. "Oh, alright then." My mouth curled into a smile and I bit my lip then I turned around quickly and walked away. I then had a good side splitting laugh for around five minutes.
All in all this seems to be a good job so far. And they treat us well too. Had two free meals with them this week, and loads of free drinks. The people I work with are cool too. Today's my day off. Gonna go do day off things now.
posted by Justin at 8:46 PM
5 Comments:
Hi Just,
Some people walk around with a halo on their head,but I think that your halo has turned into a permanent sign that says beat me, kick me,or piss on my shoes.Even small animals find you a target.I think I'll warn Wilson about your return so he can prepare to attack.
Love Belle
next time someone tools you around (like the Yeeeah Lady), you should freak out and have a breakdown. start to cry or something. but make sure you have an audience so everyone can you see taking advantage of the a little bit insane, possibly unstable victim's feelings. i would laugh.
Hey man. I just applied to vet school in Melbourne for next year!
Josee,
Merci pour vos mots d'encouragement. Je fais maintenant gaffe aux chiens, the femmes, et toutes les autres etres vivantes!
Mother,
You're right. I am a magnet for these people, and for weird experiences all together. I've come to terms with that fact, and actually come to enjoy it.
Belle,
Wilson doesn't need to be warned. I'm sure he'll be able to sense me coming.
Casey,
I will do that. Thanks for the advice. In all fairness to the crazy lady however, I don't think she was aware of what she was doing. She didn't seem to be entirely there.
AJ, That's awsome. I wanted to be a vet when I was younger, but then I helped in a vet clinic in France for about a week and got traumatized when I had to help remove a dog's gangrenous eyeball...among other equally disturbing things. Melbourne's awsome. You'll love it here I'm sure. Watch out for the animals though. They're mostly angry for some reason.
Wow, what a crazy story! I hope you are taking pictures to back up all of these stories so we can 'get the picture.' Ask people to pose for you. Also,tell the kids you are the President of the Funny Face Club of Canada and you would like a picture of their funny face to represent their country. I did that when I toured Europe in the '70's and I have some really funny photos. Everyone let their kids pose except in France!
When it comes to dogs, spray them in the face with water. They won't like that. Or pee on them.
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